I started going through my old journals and boxes of childhood stuff to help write my novel. The plot line motivating my novel isn’t biographical but the setting is andI had hoped going through my old stuff would help me with the childhood flashback scenes. So far, this hasn’t been the case, and it seems to me the stories I remember on my own, while I’m writing, are much more powerful than anything I ever recorded. Needless to say, the young girl in my novel is going to be much smarter than I ever was! But I’m still going to keep going through the box, and sharing tidbits with you here, because, basically, it is fun, and we could all use some fun. So here are a few bits from my final entries before starting high school – Lord help us all:
August 1st, 1991 (harkens my love for making lists – this is what I considered my resume!)
Name: Courtney Parks Bray
Dog: Toby
Cat: Misty
Age: 14
Grade: almost a freshman
Career Dream: ACTRESS!!!! or, an art buyer (I was interested in art history for a long time. At some point my dad told me only rich people got jobs in museums and I abandoned it – funny how powerful parents can be at that age…now I know he mostly talked out of his ass)
Sport: Tennis, Dance
Favorite Movie: Robin Hood (Ohh! Blech! Oh! Kevin Costner? Blech!)
(Okay, then it devolves into general insanity – boys I like, who my friends are, my favorite types of movies, what traits I share with my astrological sign…I’m not even retyping this for memory’s sake…when the pencil fades, so shall this…)
August 5, 1991
This shall be short. Lately I think acting shall be my life. If I can bring someone smiles or tears, then my life shall work! I want to shake up the world!
Great movie to remember: Dead Poets Society
Note: Family is in BAD mood today!
(Okay, the first couple lines would be touching on their own, but I wrote this immediately following Dead Poets Society and who doesn’t remember that young, dark actor playing Puck , and the ending, and the Oh Captain, my Captain! God, who could blame me?)
August 17th, 2007 – (On a new friend) -
One of my other new friends is Lori M-. She does however remind me almost of Chelsi. She has the same moods, speaks with the same lisp and is a show-off. I can’t keep these blond cheerleader-type people out of my life no matter how hard I try!
So, just to show how little I’ve actually shared with all of you, and how many volumes I had to write, I filled a three subject notebook between May 19th and August 17th – it was quite the angst-ridden summer, this summer before high school! At the end of it my parents are taking me on vacation for a week which I don’t seem too thrilled about although I am pretty excited to get a tan at the beach. Here are a couple “favorites” I listed at the conclusion of the journal: Favorite song – “Things that make you go Hmmm”; Favorite Singer: Rod Steward; Favorite City -Chicago; Favorite store – Bloomingdales. I guess some things never do change!
6 responses so far ↓
Kerryn // August 30, 2007 at 11:18 am |
Another wonderful diary post! Hindsight is wonderful — sometimes, when I’ve delved into the murky pages of my diaries, I wish I could give my younger self a stern talking to or a little bit more encouragement.
Fathers exert so much influence on their daughters at that age. I was around 14 when my father convinced me that I was too impatient to be a teacher (of course I was impatient, I was a teenager) and that I should be an accountant. It was in 1991, as I received my degree, that I realised I was never going to make a career of accountancy.
And, yes, I remember Dead Poets Society. I’ve not watched it for years. I don’t want to spoil my memories of such a wonderful movie.
Katie // August 30, 2007 at 12:33 pm |
It’s funny how people who want to be young actresses suddenly start using the helping verb ’shall’ instead of ‘will’
Just sounds better doesn’t it?
everythinginbetween // August 30, 2007 at 2:28 pm |
Kerryn – it’s frightening how much fathers do influence their daughters. I remember my dad saying things he swears he didn’t say, or else he can’t believe I took him so earnestly. I don’t think I’ll ever watch Dead Poets Society again, either – GREAT movie at the time I watched it and I would hate to lose the memories.
Katie – the weird thing is, that’s the only entry I did that in!
Fence // August 31, 2007 at 8:16 am |
I always think that this is the real value of diaries, the ability to look back at our younger selves and see how different we were. Plus “If I can bring someone smiles or tears, then my life shall work!” this is true
everythinginbetween // August 31, 2007 at 2:10 pm |
Fence – I agree – that’s definitely teh value of diaries! Plus the fact the allow you to get all your emotion out in such a productive, non-hurtful way…
david // August 31, 2007 at 7:46 pm |
Ah, to be young and naive. I think I would love to have a list like this from my past. Unfortunately, to the extent that I ever made them, I think I would have discarded them.
I still enjoy your list though. Thanks for sharing.